Brighty Whitey

Google says this is Mother Nature. I say this is some stoned sister of the Jolly Green Giant.

 Seeing as that I have to complain about everything. HELLO! We all know that I am Jewish by now. I feel the need to stick it to mother nature today. Within the past month we have had torrential downpours and 30 degree weather in San Diego. I know you dirty east coasters don't understand that 30 degree weather in So-Cal means "I'm so cold my nipples just froze off my body and now look like cement freckles," but it does and you should sympatize (spelled the way hottie with the body Rev. Al Sharpton would say it).

But today was one asshole of a day. No, not in a bad way. As in, it was so hot I literally felt like I was stuck in someone's asshole. I am such a lady. It was such a nice change from the norm. Unfortunately, my skin, once compared to a vampires white, has been in hibernation. I literally could be a persons flashlight because I am so white. I am so white that they should have a box under Caucasian that says "Bright White." That bad.

So here's my little tiff with MN. That slut gave me a sunburn! Technically, it was her little bitch we like to call the "sun" that did it. I still blame MN. Suck it weather whore.